Noo ma story tells ye o’ a lad och I’ll jist ca’ him Wull
He drives the orra baister on the Mains o’ Pyker’s hull
For a cheerier lad ye’ll never see jist something like masel’
Until ae nicht when he got fu bad luck him befell 

Noo this bad luck it taen the form o’ big fat Jeannie Bell
O’er thirteen stane o’ muscle an’ bane three times as big’s masel’
Noo when Wull wis fu she taen her chance an’ she got aff her mark
For she dragged him tae the register wi’ the lang tale o’ his sark

Noo beside his spouse our brave Wull stood the sweat fae him did rise
For his bonnet it wis ticht tae reach the hicht o’ Jeannie’s stays
Noo Wull began tae sober up jist tae see what was in store
For he chanced anither look at her an’ he hurled rich toot the door

Noo the mannie wi’ the Bible glowered he thocht this unco queer
For stannin’ like the Law hull oor Jeannie didna steer
Noo Wull he wisna lookin’ back for he never made the stair
For she clappit her fit and nailed him wi’ the sark tail tae the flair

Noo Wull complains in bed at nicht he doesnae get his share
His sleep is oft times broken when he gangs dunt on the flair
“Get up ye feil an’ mak some tea” ye’ll hear his guidwife bark
It’s a lauch tae see Wull makin’ tea dressed in his lang tailed sark

Noo the grieve he says tae Wull each morn “Hoo is it ye’re late for wark”
Oh Wull he said “The wife wis lyin’ on the lang tail o’ ma sark”
“Look here ma man o’ that’s nae use jist try this for a lark
An’ slip intae yer bed the nicht with oot yer lang tailed sark”

Noo you should see Wull’s family noo each een is sax foot three
Oh five big strappin’ dochters an’ sons oor Wull hae three
Noo Jeannie says “Look here ma man yer bite’s worse than yer bark
For I think the time has come for you tae wear yer lang tailed sark”