Had a mild panic
last week, when my phone went dead; this of course meant that there was no
Internet access either. I phoned BT Faults on my mobile, and the nice Indian (I
think) gentleman, tested the phone line, and told me that there was a fault at
the Exchange; the punch line was that it would be fixed by the 28th
June! Spluttering slightly, I pointed out that it was 22nd June, so
how would it take 6 days to fix a fault at the Exchange? No answer was
forthcoming, and I do not know whether BT Faults was speaking from Delhi or
Derby.
However, my
panic was in vain, as before 9 am the next morning the local exchange phoned to
say it was fixed. The upside was that instead of footering about on my PC I
watched Brazil v Japan on TV, and thoroughly enjoyed it; strange thing about
that was that never once did the commentator mention that the Japanese
midfielder, Nakamura, played for Celtic. Mind you, if Nakamura’s grandfather
had turned out once for the reserves at Accrington Stanley, that would have
merited a mention of England’s World Cup win in 1966. What banalities we have
to thole.
MORAY BY ELECTION
Well, the
votes are in and counted long ago, but the costs have only now been counted; in
the table below, the votes for each party, the costs for each party, and the
cost per vote. I haven’t seen any details, but wonder if the Tory candidate’s
expenses include a redundancy payment, as she resigned her position as a list
MSP to contest the seat – ill advisedly, as it can be seen?
The
average cost of each vote comes in at £6.50, so Richard Lochhead’s campaign was
quite frugal; then again, we were not able to get loans from rich backers. The
Tory would-be grandees may not be too pleased at how their money was squandered;
as Angus Robertson SNP MP put it quite succinctly: “Both the Tories and the
Liberal Democrats spent a fortune trying to buy a victory in Moray and failed
spectacularly.”
|
|
|
Votes |
|
Cost |
|
Per vote |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
SNP |
|
12653 |
|
33547.44 |
|
2.65 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Tory |
|
6268 |
|
91132.09 |
|
14.54 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Liberal |
|
5310 |
|
42233.80 |
|
7.95 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Labour |
|
2696 |
|
10025.30 |
|
3.72 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
NHS First |
|
493 |
|
1238.61 |
|
2.51 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Total |
|
27420 |
|
178177.24 |
|
6.50 |
RED,
WHITE AND BLUE FACED BROWN
It would
seem that our Chancellor is not exactly endearing himself to the lieges in
Middle England; as the saga of which team our politicians support grows feet and
legs, Gordon Brown’s attitudes are being viewed with suspicion. This factor has
been picked up in the English press by our man in Surrey, Andrew J T Kerr.
Andrew has found that the English would expect any Scot to support a Scottish
team, and would be disappointed, but not particularly surprised, when the same
Scot did not support the English team. As such, they now tend to view Brown’s
vociferous support for England as a piece of hypocrisy, designed to attract
their votes, and not a genuine emotion at all; if it is said that power
corrupts, then the prospect of power is even more corrupting.
Methinks Brown is about to discover the truth of the old adage: “Oh what
tangled webs we weave, when first we practise to deceive.”
LEOPARD DOES NOT
CHANGE ITS SPOTS
We refer of
course to that true Englishman, David Cameron, who is happy enough to have a
Scottish name, but completely indifferent to Scotland; this can be quite clearly
seen in the way in which he changed Tory policy on the Common Fisheries Policy
without even informing, never mind consulting any of the Scottish Tories. Or
perhaps, it is the Tories in the Scottish Parliament he ignored, as it would
appear his solitary Scottish Westminster MP is happy to do his bidding.
It was the Tory Prime Minister, Ted Heath, who sacrificed the Scottish fishing
interests when Britain joined the European Economic Community; he also was
completely indifferent, and threw away the fishing rights as they were of no
consequence. In one regard, he was correct, as they had ceased to have any
significance in England, but were of great importance to Scotland; the fishing
industry had been vitally important to England in Elizabethan times, and the
custom of fish on Friday was instituted so that England would always have a
plentiful supply of sailors to man her warships. (Who was left to catch the fish
during the many wars was never clear.) That is no longer the case, and there is
no navy to speak of any more anyway.
However, I digress, as is my wont; Cameron has also come out for only
English MPs to vote on English issues, but as he only has one Scottish Tory MP
he can afford to take that attitude; he has also said that Mrs Thatcher was
right to be hard on Scotland and Wales. He claimed she made difficult
decisions, but as far as I can see they were easy decisions for her, but
difficult for us. Always good for someone else to feel the pain, but we are
still left with the legacy of unemployment and degradation. She of course,
being immune to that sort of thing, managed to keep her son from being locked up
in an African pokey for gun running, or some such crime; what was his
particular catch phrase? “Time to pay up for Mumsie.”
And now, a British Bill of Rights – and the repeal of the 1998 Human
Rights Act- is on Cameron’s agenda; this is cobbled up as helping the police in
their fight against terrorists. Now, I feel that the police should have every
assistance, but two incidents in London make me wonder at how effective they are
now, and whether the relaxation of law would make life safer for us all; I refer
of course to the recent incident where 250 police descended on a house in London
and arrested two brothers, shooting one of them during the incident. Both
brothers were subsequently found to be completely innocent. The other one last
year was the identification, pursuit and shooting of a young Brazilian, who was
also found to be completely innocent; not much use when you’re dead.
So I worry about any relaxation in the law on Human Rights, and I think we
have had enough of the attempts to bring in “lawful detention of suspects” by
New Labour; I would expect the Tories to be even more authoritarian.
My reference to the leopard is of course a comment on the English heraldic
symbol so much on display these days; they infer it is three lions, but in fact
it is three leopards, couchant passant, as they say in heraldry. It would seem
that in early days there was some difficulty in distinguishing between lions and
leopards, but then most people would never have seen either, and there was no
David Attenborough, TV or local zoo to enlighten them.
THE FOOTBALL
FAULT LINE
All of a
sudden, the relationship between Scotland and England is front page news; we see
attacks on the Barnett formula, attacks on Scottish MPs voting in the House of
Commons, opinion polls on Gordon
Brown’s suitability to wear the crown,
subsidised Scots, Scottish mafia running England, ungrateful pensioners to a
generous English state, whingeing Jocks, all the trappings of racism emerging.
It would seem that this has suddenly become high profile because England are
in the World Cup, and Scotland isn’t, and the English media require from us the
craven idolatry they receive from their own fans, and bitterly resent it when
this is not forthcoming. Some of the stuff being printed in the English
tabloids is barely believable, and if it was directed at Muslims or Jews the
editors would be in jail.
These excerpts from Kelvin MacKenzie’s column in the English version of the Sun
speak for themselves: (I don’t think he is even an apostate Scot.)
22nd June 2006
“
I have some good news and bad news about the English-hating Scots. The good
news is that they are dying sooner than the rest of us.
The Office of National Statistics reveals that Glaswegians especially are going
early.
The Government office says that thanks to a lifelong diet of misery, cynicism,
fried mars bars and tins of syrupy beer, Glaswegians are turning in their
sporrans at 70 years old, compared to the UK average of 76.
Now the bad news. Five years ago Allan Robinson, 44, moved from Leeds to the
ugly suburb of Coatbridge in Lanarkshire.
(Last year, Coatbridge had more 999 calls than the rest of Scotland. Nice
people.)
He put a single St George's Cross in his window to support England. The effect;
thugs smashed three windows. He went down to the shops in his England kit with
his girlfriend and the locals hurled abuse at them. He was so frightened, he
didn't leave his home all weekend and is now thinking of moving. Only thinking?
The faster we accept that Scotland and England are two nations divided by a
common language, the better.
My solution is simple. Build Hadrian's Wall another hundred foot higher and
start airlifting in parcels of... mars bars.”
1st June 2006
“I'm beginning to weary at the outbursts of Andrew Murray, the young Scottish
tennis player whose conceit is not regrettably matched by his talent.
His latest idea to prove his Scottishness (presumably mean and morose) is by
announcing he will wear a Paraguayan shirt when England play against them in the
World Cup.
I quite understand Scots not liking the English, even dim ones like Mr Murray.
It must be painful to receive handouts to the tune of £30bn this year - money
generated by the clever English.
It must be painful for more and more Scots to leave behind the land of call
centres and golf courses and head to London to find work - once again supplied
by the clever English.
The latest figures from the 2001 Census showed there were 800,000 Scots living
in England, and since the South East has continued to explode while Scotland -
as The Economist points out this week - continues to decline, those numbers will
have risen sharply from that.
It must be painful to recognise that these days all Scotland can export is
national politicians (Blair, Brown, Reid) whose major skill set is telling lies.
So next time, Mr Murray, you are down south (possibly Wimbledon, although your
first-round exit from the French Open won't have helped your ambition) perhaps
you can try and work out how many Scots are in the stadium and, more
importantly, who paid for their seats.
And another thing, why do we carry the Scottish football results?”
Compiler's Comment:
Really nice.
Oh and by the way, would you believe that customers who phone financial firms
trust staff with a Scottish accent more than anyone else?
FOOT IN THE MOUTH NOTES
Interesting
to see First Minister, Jack McConnell, going into hysterical overdrive when
Nicola Sturgeon asked him a reasonable question about Trident; he even ranted
that the SNP would abolish the Scottish Regiments.
That
would be problematical, as Labour has already done so, but perhaps Mr McConnell
hasn’t noticed.
Congressional staff in America are investigating errors in US
licenses awarded to oil companies for leases in the Gulf of Mexico; apparently
these mistakes have cost the US Treasury $10 billion over the past 25 years, and
the oil firms may have to fork out the dough.
And on
this side of the Atlantic, we await with baited breath some Freedom of
Information requests to the Department of Energy; it is known that the British
Government in its haste to get its hands on the cash from the North Sea
issued licences in a profligate fashion, and undercharged the oil companies.
It was not $10 billion over 25 years, but an estimated £100 billion over 30
years, or to make the figures roughly comparable, America is worried about
losing $0.4 billion a year for 25 years, while Britain is not worried about
having lost $6 billion a year for 30 years.
The House of Lords
Economic Affairs Committee has been severely critical of the way
the government published plans for a raid on
inheritance tax trusts, plans which have been now watered down. While the plans
were designed to close tax loopholes, they could also have hit families trying
to pass on money, said the peers.
How altruistic
of the Lords.
Lord Barnett, architect of the Barnett formula, now says that Scotland should
lose billions so that more money could go to needy parts of England.
We already do,
my Lord, we already do.
No doubt an apochryphal story, but has the ring of truth about it; there was a
discussion as to what would be the collective term for a gathering of former
British Prime Ministers.
The most apt one was judged to be: “A lack of principles.” (Or principals?).
Probably sounds better than it reads.
A claim that the contract for kilts for the new Royal Regiment of Scotland was
going to be awarded to a Scottish prime contractor to keep the work in Scotland
was questioned by the MoD Press Officer for Scotland; she said the contract had
not been awarded. Her letter concluded: “The MoD’s top procurement priorities
are simple; to ensure the Armed Forces have the best equipment available,
whether that’s an aircraft carrier, a gun, helmet or kilt, and to spend its
money carefully.”
This week the all-party Public Accounts Committee into MoD spending says they
overspent by £3 billion on their 19 largest projects; this did not include the
Eurofighter which is £2 billion over budget. Savings of £700 million on Astute
submarines and Future Aircraft Carriers were only achieved by reducing weaponry
orders and downgrading kit for front line soldiers.
"Scottish voters need to know whether or not he supports the building of new nuclear power stations in Scotland, but once again he's dodged the issue. He's clearly more interested in appeasing his masters in London than improving the lives of people in Scotland. 
Reacting to Charles Clarke MP's criticism of Tony Blair and John Reid, SNP Leader, Alex Salmond MP said:
Recent news reports suggest that Lord Levy, Labour's main fundraiser, will be questioned in private tomorrow by the Constitutional Committee. Mr MacNeil believes this is unhelpful and could undermine the current police investigation if information on the proceedings leaks.
The European Commission (EC) has been investigating the project following a complaint by David Black, the architectural writer. In their submission to the EC the Executive accepted that the then Scottish Office had failed to follow proper procedures in holding an open and fair tendering process when they offered the contract to Enric Miralles.
"In order to accommodate adult wheelchair bound people existing facilities would need to be enhanced and adapted to include a changing table and hoist. 
Ms Hyslop said:
Mr Weir asked the Defence Minister whether the rumoured deployment of 45 Commando, who are acknowledged experts in winter warfare, still meant that the UK troops deployed in the area fell within the current deployment levels laid out by the international force.
Also in response to this news Mr Wishart is making a bid for the new panel to be based in Perthshire since its establishment was agreed at the G8 conference held at Gleneagles.
eagalach nuair a bhios daoine cinnteach gu bheil eòlas aca air toil Dhè. Bidh e a’ cur iongnadh orm dè cho tric ‘s a bhios toil Dhè gu math cosail ris na bha daoine an dòchas a dhèanamh co-dhiù. Bha murtairean 9/11 ceart cinnteach gun robh fhios aca dè bha Dia ag iarraidh orra agus nach iad a bha fortanach gum b’ e sin na chuir iad romhpa a dhèanamh, Dia ann no às? Chan eil e idir ceart ma bhios Cal Mac a’ cur seirbheis air an aghaidh toil nan eileanach agus ma ‘s e sin na tha tachairt bu chòir dhuinn uile a bhith feuchainn ri stad a chur air na bàtaichean, ach chan eil e follaiseach bhon taobh a-muigh gun e sin na tha tachairt. Carson nach tèid rannsachadh a dhèanamh san sgìre le Cal Mac? Nach tachradh sin nam bitheadh rudeigin cosail ri seo air tìr-mòr, no rudeigin co-cheangailte ri creideamh eile?
Gordon
Wright’s Scottish Photo
Library
30 June
2005
6 July
1699
Eric
Linklater (1899-1974)
This
week’s column comes with a cold weather forecast – for more read on! In
the days before Global Warning, the Scots, indeed people world-wide,
could work out weather patterns eg. a piece of Candlemas (1 February)
weather lore gave rise to the verse –