As you will see from the figures below, we are almost at the level we were at the time of the Election, when we got 35 seats, so on the basis of this there would be no change in the composition of the Scottish Parliament. As is customary, when Roseanna was commenting on the poll, she put the best gloss on it that she could, which is to say that the battle is between Labour and the SNP, with the other parties nowhere.

Interesting that the Tories have moved up a bit, probably because they have had a high profile, and the emergence of Kenneth Clarke as the front runner in the leadership stakes is giving them some encouragement; whether you happen to like him or not, at least he gives the appearance of competence. In this respect it is worth remembering that when Margaret Thatcher came to power, she did it with the slogan "Labour Isn’t Working", and by the end of her first term unemployment had risen to 2 million!

Under Others, the SSP has gone up from 3% first vote and 4% second vote to 5% first vote and 6% second vote; whether this is because they have now been joined by Father Steven Gilhooley, the turbulent Edinburgh priest, is a moot point. The SSP has up to now been a one man party, the preserve of the master of the sound bite, Tommy Sheridan, MSP; just before the Election they were joined by Colin Bell, previous Vice Chairman of the SNP, and previous editor of our big brother, the Scots Independent Newspaper, and this might add a touch of reality to their appeal. The Greens and Dennis Canavan show an increase from 1% to 2% on the first vote and a decrease of from 6% to 5% on the second vote; we do not think Dennis Canavan a sure fire winner in Falkirk West, after his prevarication over rejoining New Labour or not. The fact that he even considered betraying his electoral workers, and his voters, will count against him, even if he did not ultimately do that.

GATES RATTLED AS WELL AS CAGES

An item in the Tam Jenkins Home column in the August issue of the Scots Independent has fairly upset Glasgow University; in the article the University was described as "a bastion of British imperialism", and it was criticising the University for a proposal to put the names of Donald Dewar and John Smith on their memorial gates.

The item said "And to prove all that it has added the names in gilt of the arch anti-nationalists to its memorial gates of two former colonial governors of Scotland, the Rt Hon John Smith and the Rt Hon Donald Dewar - following a sustained campaign by the Labour Party’s spin doctors retrospectively to sanctify the reputations they never had in life." According to the Sunday Times, an SNP spokesman, speaking deadpan, we might imagine, said "The Scots Independent is an independent publication. It is a matter for Glasgow University whom it chooses to honour in this way."

The Sunday Times also quoted a Brian Fitzpatrick," who replaced Donald Dewar as MSP for Anniesland"; we cannot remember the name of the Labour Party’s invisible candidate for Anniesland, but we do not think it was Brian Fitzpatrick. We think Brian Fitzpatrick was a Dewar aide, who was sacked by Henry McLeish, and became an MSP for another seat somewhere, after some dispute within the local Labour Party. His salary would have been included in the £527207 for eight special advisors employed before Mr Dewar’s sudden death in October. A trifling £65900 each, but probably Mr Fitzpatrick got more, as he was a big shot; the cost has gone up to £758000 but there are now eleven, so the figure is now £68900 a skull - who says the gravy train has stopped?

However, we digress; the Scots Independent editor, Kenneth Fee, was unrepentant. (We have not known him to be anything else.) He said it was time that Glasgow honoured such eminent nationalist graduates as Sir Compton Mackenzie, author of Whisky Galore, Dr John MacCormick, who founded the Scottish Covenant campaign (and author of The Flag in the Wind) and Professor Robert Silver, the desalination pioneer. The university said that it honoured former graduates and cited Adam Smith, the economist and James Watt, the engineer; neither of these were politicians, and their legacies to mankind were beneficial. Mr John Smith, a late convert to Home Rule, left an unholy mess in his Monklands constituency which he had not tackled, and Mr Dewar, another late convert, left an even more unholy mess with the new Holyrood Parliament. In their drive to canonise Mr Dewar, Labour members conveniently forget about his waspish spite, as felt by (now) Sir Sean Connery, and Dennis Canavan, to name but two; they also forget that when Labour was in opposition (and pretending to have principles) Mr Dewar was the Chief Whip in the House of Commons, not a job for a goody two shoes.

WATER UNDER THE COUNTER

What a paradoxical world we all live in in this Scotland 2001. The chief executive of West of Scotland Water, Scotland’s largest water authority, Ernest Chambers, retired on 22nd July, at the age of 54, with a voluntary redundancy sum of £200000, plus a pension lump sum of £150000. This was not an exorbitant sum, as his salary was £120000 . However, the Board decided to retain him as a consultant, providing technical assistance as and when needed, until October. He then told his former employers that he was taking up a post with Beattie Media on 1st August; this set alarm bells ringing. Mr Chambers was the chief executive when Beattie Media got the contract with West of Scotland Water, and when the three Water Boards are merged in April next year there will be rich pickings for PR companies.

The new chief executive of WOSW, to cut down on words, decided that there would be a conflict of interest, and withdrew the consultancy offer; this despite the statement from Beattie Media that Mr Chambers would not be working for the authority or any other public sector client, would not be involved in public relations, but was hired for his managerial and organisational expertise. This was so obviously true, that WOSW then decided not to continue with its public relations contract with Beattie Media.

Beattie Media were first employed by WOSW in 1997, when 60000 consumers were without water for five days, while Mr Chambers continued his holiday in the Maldives; they did not reconnect the water, but probably made people feel better about being dirty and thirsty. Observers of the Scottish political scene will also remember the lobbygate issue, when Kevin Reid, son of the now Northern Ireland Secretary, Dr John Reid, boasted to two Observer (as in Sunday newspaper) reporters that he could get instant access to Scottish Government Ministers, specifically mentioning Jack McConnell, whose diary was then mysteriously destroyed, there not being a secretary a la Lord Archer to photocopy it. Young Mr Reid thought he was talking to two rich businessmen, and the subsequent investigation cleared Jack McConnell.

And just for interest, I looked up the minutes of West of Scotland Water Board for 26th January 2001, the last published minutes on the web, to see if there was any reference to Mr Chamber’s departure, and came across a different, but now topical item: "For reasons of commercial confidentially, this item was considered in private session. The Board agreed to the disposal of the wind rights at Greenfield Farm on the Eaglesham Moor and authorised the formal negotiation of contracts." - Hmm!

HENRY SEEKS THE HANDOUT?

The First Minister, Henry McLeish has emphatically denied that he has asked the Treasury for £1 billion (shades of "It isn’t for myself, you understand".) The money is reported to be for the transfer of Glasgow Council’s housing to community ownership, and the other is for free personal care for the elderly; Alasdair Morgan, shadow finance minister said the claim only strengthened the argument for the Scottish Parliament to have control over its own finances. Alasdair said "Fiscal independence would allow Scotland to make its own decisions with its own money and would end the situation where we send a budget surplus to the UK Exchequer." Between last year and this year, the surplus totalled £7.8 billion.

Of course fiscal freedom is a hot potato, and we suspect that Mr McLeish may well feel as we do, that he should be able to raise and spend the cash; he must be absolutely furious at the Holyrood fiasco, where the legacy from Donald Dewar is going to be a bill for around £300 million, decided by Westminster, but paid out of the Scottish Parliament’s budget. Incidentally, on that particular subject, next year the Church of Scotland will require the Assembly Rooms back during May, and they are talking of decamping to Aberdeen, Inverness or Dundee for the period; how sensible if they just moved a short distance to the old Royal High School on the Calton Hill - and a lot cheaper too.

THE PRIVATE ADVANTAGES

Just a couple of weeks ago I travelled up the A9 to Inverness, and I noticed a lot of road signs saying "BEAR"; I did not think they were a part of the latest ecological wheeze to bring back brown bears to Scotland, but forgot about it until today. The company concerned is one of those who won the contract to maintain the roads; both Bear and Amey won contracts totalling £350 million over five years after undercutting councils. They are now in the news as both companies have been served default notices because they are not doing what they are getting paid for. As Sarah Boyack, the Transport Minister, had to face a no confidence motion in February, after she forced the issue through Parliament, this is highly embarrassing; what is surprising is that the Government is surprised!

Continuing on their merry privatisation way, the Government is not saying anything about the latest criticisms over PFI; two medical experts have now come out to stress that the first call on any Trust’s finances is the payment of PFI costs. We have touched on this subject before, usually with a sledgehammer, but it seems that the New Labour Government is hell bent on putting even more hospitals under PFI, and seem incapable of making any kind of commercial common sense; private companies put money into public services not to help public services, but to make more money.

Just this week I had delivered through my letterbox a publication entitled The NHS in Lothian News; not a big glossy, but quite well produced, and informative. However, it hardly makes a mention of the new flagship hospital being built under PFI; it tells me that there will be a single board for NHS Lothian, a new hospital in Midlothian, that waiting lists have been cut and are well ahead of the national target, even all about a new building at the Western General. In the small print, and I bless my cataract operation, or I would have missed it, it says the first phase will be completed this autumn. However, it will still have less beds than are currently available, and as there is also a crisis in the care of the elderly, with bed blocking taking up 210 beds, what will they do then? Add to this that Lothian primary care is heading for an overspend of £8 million, and Lothian University Hospital Trust is heading for one of £5.2 million, it is obvious that something is far wrong. There is also a shortage of nurses, and a crisis of morale in the nursing profession; this means that the hospitals have to use agency or bank nurses (no I don’t know the difference) and the agency will be paid more than double the rate that an NHS nurse will get; so you have two nurses on a ward, and it could be the one with less skill is being paid a lot more than the regular one. It’s the economics of the market, and it does not work; private companies run nursing agencies not to help hospital trusts but to make money.

And according to the GMB union (who have a vested interest right enough) the cost of building the first 14 PFI hospitals will be double the original estimate; the worst overrun so far was the rebuilding of the University College Hospital in London, which went from £115 million to £404 million. All this will be paid by the taxpayer - us.

FOOT IN THE MOUTH NOTES

Mrs Helen Liddell, Scottish Secretary, has been given two tasks; she has to look after the grassroots organisation for Labour, and also to encourage more direct flights from Scotland.

It is nice that she will now have something to do; instead of being known as Stalin’s Granny, she will be known as Weedol.

According to a Daily Telegraph poll, 25% of Conservative members would leave the party if Kenneth Clarke became leader.

Does that mean that 75% would leave if he didn’t become leader?

The aforesaid Mr Clarke is said to be ambivalent on the issue of all woman shortlists of candidates.

We now await equal rights with all men shortlists of candidates.

Irish investors own 30% of Celtic Football Club, and two Irish investors have taken an 8% stake in Manchester United, which cost them £30 million; in the year 2000, so many new cars were sold in the Irish Republic that the banks had to devise special finance packages to help garages to cope with unwanted secondhand vehicles.

The Irish government have not approached the British treasury for £1 billion, but we are sure that Labour MSPs still tell Irish jokes.

When Prince Charles fell off his horse playing polo and was knocked unconscious one tabloid filled the front page with the picture and story.

They need not have worried, as he did not fall on his head; that happened at an earlier stage.

Absolutely astonished that Mohammed al Fayed has sacked his personal assistant for irregularities which "relate solely to Fayed’s personal accounts."

As the man had been in the job for more than 10 years, he must be clever; there is a job for him in PFI.

There has been an increase in low flying in Scotland over the last year; this mirrors a reduction elsewhere in the UK. The MOD says the ability to fly at low level , including at night, remains vital to the armed forces.

I thought the problem in Kosovo was that the planes kept missing targets because they had to fly too high in case they were hit.

Next year will be the Queen’s Golden Jubilee, fifty years on the throne. Royal officials are worried that this will be greeted by the public with indifference.

Yawn.

LOCKERBIE

As the appeal of the Lockerbie bomber gets under way, a new book will be published in September; it is titled "Lockerbie - A Bum Rap" The 12 year snow job. The book is written by David Rollo, assistant editor (international) of the Scots Independent.

It says "The bomb which destroyed Pan Am 103 was probably primed and/or initially loaded at Heathrow. The officially assumed need to keep Syria and Iran on our side, or at least neutral in the Gulf War switched attention to Libya."

The book is essentially a demand for a "proper" inquiry and the publication of its results. It will be published in September 2001 by Scots Independent (Newspapers) Ltd; price £2.95, plus post 35p UK, 80p, Europe air, £1.17 rest of world air, 59p surface.              

NEW LABOUR FAILING IN THE CLASSROOM

Children are still enduring overcrowded classrooms, despite government pledges to recruit more teachers. The ratio of pupils to teachers has fallen by only a fraction since New Labour came to power, according to figures published yesterday. The figures also underlined that children being educated at state schools in inner-city areas are still significantly more likely to be taught in packed classrooms than those at schools in rural areas. Michael Russell, shadow education minister, said: "Despite the many pledges the Scottish government has made, these figures highlight that they have manifestly failed to deliver on their promises." The teacher statistics for Scotland also showed that 70 per cent of teachers were now aged over 40, raising fears that ministers were still not doing enough to attract young graduates into the profession. Mr Russell said: "The government has to address the issue of teacher employment to ensure we have sufficient numbers to meet the needs of Scottish children in the future." Despite the executive 's priority of reducing class sizes, there were 19 primary pupils to every teacher last year - a fall of only one pupil from the average of 20 per teacher in 1997. The situation is worse in state secondary schools, where there were 13.2 pupils to every teacher in 1997 and last year there were 13 pupils to every teacher.

TOURISM FUNDS BOOSTER FOR HIGHLANDS & ISLANDS

The SNP has welcomed £36 million of funding to develop activity holidays and improve tourist accommodation in the Highlands & Islands. The cash is in the shape of two initiatives funded jointly by the public and private sectors, both of which will offer grants to tourism businesses across the region. Duncan Hamilton, shadow Highlands & Islands minister, said: "Any additional investment in the tourism sector in the region is to be welcomed however it is still essential for the Scottish government to address the long term structural problems facing the tourism sector in the Highlands & Islands." Mr Hamilton identified these as the high cost of fuel in rural areas of Scotland, the slump in the industry caused by foot-and-mouth, and under investment in the transport infrastructure.

CASH BONUS FOR SCHOOLS FALLS SHORT

Schools across Scotland are to be given £10 million to spend on books, equipment and urgent repairs, it was announced today. Head teachers will be given the freedom to choose where they spend the money - whether it be on buildings or in the classroom. The SNP's shadow education minister, Mike Russell, said the money was only "a drop in the ocean" that would not even meet the repair bill for any of Scotland's local authorities. "Any additional investment in Scotland's schools is obviously to be welcomed, however, the £10 million announced today by the education minister is only a drop in the ocean and works out at only £3,494 per school and £13 per pupil," Mr Russell said. "The actual backlog for repairs alone is £1.5 billion and £10 million would not even meet the total repair bill for any one of Scotland's 32 local authorities. At a time when our schools are facing a severe lack of investment the Lib Dem-controlled Scottish Borders recently announced deep cuts in their education services all we have today from the education minister is window dressing."

LORD OWEN SHOULD GET EVIDENCE OVER HEPATITIS C

Former Health Minister, Lord Owen, today queried whether enough money had been spent to provide safe blood products for hemophiliacs and called for a substantial increase in compensation levels for victims. As a result Shadow Deputy Health and Community Care Minister Shona Robison requested Lord Owen be invited to get the evidence to the Health and Community Care Committee before it completes its report into the large number of hemophiliacs infected with hepatitis C due to contaminated the blood products. Ms Robison commented "Lord Owen has made some very powerful comments about whether enough money was spent at the time to provide safe blood products for hemophiliacs."

THOUSANDS WILL STILL BE WORRIED FOLLOWING SQA ANNOUNCEMENT

Shadow Minister for Children and Education Michael Russell has today welcomed progress from the SQA but expressed significant concerns that over 1,500 candidates have certificates which cannot yet be completed due to missing data or incorrect entries. While encouraged by the fact that 17,000 missing results last year has this year been reduced to just over fifteen hundred, Mr. Russell urged the SQA to make "every possible effort" to correct the errors before the final posting date for certificates. Mr. Russell also announced that, once this year's results process is finished, he would be urging the Education Minister to bring forward plans for a complete revision of the Scottish Examination system.

ANTI-SCOTTISH DECISION COSTS 366 JOBS AT ROSYTH

Following the news today that the Babcock engineering have announced plans for more than 360 job losses at the Rosyth dockyard, the Shadow Defense Spokesperson Colin Campbell described the announcement as "a savage blow to the workers at Rosyth and their families". Mr. Campbell continued "The damaging impact of London-based policies is seriously weakening the Scottish economy. Scotland needs the powers of Independence so that we can develop policies that are tailored for Scottish conditions and opportunities. Scotland has been left with the danger of Trident nuclear submarines, but the jobs have been taken away."